Still-life watercolors...fruit, flowers, and vases arranged in unnatural poises with shadows and shines.
Pointillism...Seurat sure was terrible at color-by-number painting--no stroke!
Monet's Impressionistic style and method...impressive, but--no point!
Cubism...Braque and Picasso would have made lousy jig-saw puzzle partners.
Self-portraits...the essential narcissism of the eye: Picasso never put on a shirt and probably had a broken mirror when he painted his.
Surrealism of Salvador Dali...He'd better hoped those watches he painted dripping off the table and trees were Timex--"takes a melting and keeps on ticking!"
Pastoral landscapes...Just give me an old country dirt road, a barn, and bluebonnets any day!
Modern art...Radigeometry vs. Godsplazilla!
Nudes...I'd like 'em better in person in the flesh.

